LACK OF UNDERSTANDING AND EMPATHY SEEMS TO BE A RULE IN BARNEVERNET
Friday the 16 of September we actually had our FIRST real meeting with
barnevernet (even though it's been 18 months since Aria was abducted by
The meeting was something of a strange experience. Even though we, as Arias parents asked for the meeting, the barnevernet dictated the first part of the agenda. They threatened us to not post pictures of here on Facebook any more.
But luckily and as ALWAYS, this was recorded and will of course be included in the complete case against them.
Arnfinn Heimstad stated that this meeting was a hope of a new start and some kind of cooperation. But we feel that threatening and making accusations is not the way to start a new cooperation. But on the positive side, we met the new case worker. We both got a good impression of her based on the short time we had together. However, the second in charge of Lørenskog barnevern, Anne Lise Bangsund, now showed a different side of herself, interrupting Arnfinn Heimstad many times and giving a impression that she is running the office and not him.
We had only one question we wanted answered-the reunification AND WHAT barnevernet expect from us as parents to reach that one and only goal we accept. Their answer was truly confusing and totally without any sense. They said that they ADVICED us (in a threatfull tone) to get therapy for our grief due to the loss of Aria, and to get therapy for the crisis we are in.
We already go to counseling and have a good and trusting relationship with our therapist. But barnevernet thinks she is to positive towards us, so they want to coerce us to get another, paid by them.
So imagine your rapist will be paying for the counselling you need after the trauma he inflicted on you, and also wants to pick your therapist. That's empathy for you in the barnevern-way!
we are deeply concerned for their ability to mentalize-perhaps there is a class they can participate in?
And if you want, please let me know.
Then I of course can provide some links.